Tell Us How You Really Feel: Goldman Sachs/Tim Geithner Conspiracy Edition

We'd like to give Maxine Waters credit for spawning the whole Goldman Sachs-running the universe conspiracy theory but we simply can't give her credit for a number of reasons that we won't get into here (okay, one: she's incapable of forming a coherent sentence).

Matt Taibbi is getting lots of attention for his "vampire squid on the face of America" analogy etc. etc. Hyperbole? Poss.

But when you have old Reagan soldiers calling you out...hard to say...is thing gaining real traction? Is Maxine Waters a benefactor of "better to be lucky than good"? We won't believe it...

Former US Assistant Secretary Of The Treasury: "Geithner Works For Goldman" [Zero Hedge] Sphere: Related Content

Counting to Ten Helped us From Completed Throwing a Conniption Over This

Our feelings have been made known, on several occasions, regarding the FASB's inability to get the stones to tell Congress that they need to butt the fuck out when it comes to accounting rules.

So when Bob Herz, the FASB Chair, makes speeches at the National Press Club saying, "The investing public expects and deserves unbiased and transparent financial information that is not skewed to favor particular transactions, companies or industries," we almost blow a gasket, because, um, "WHAT HAVE WE BEEN SAYING TO YOU BOB?!? HAVE YOU BEEN LISTENING?"

The only thing that stops us is that maybe, just maybe, this is some super-duper double secret strategy to get the Sass from Mass and Maxine "Wait Until I Get My Hands On You, Goldman" Waters to step off from trying to boss around the Oracles of Double-Entry Accounting. Pipe dream? It's poss.

True, Herz and company would do well to take some lessons in snark, maybe courtesy of Jr. Deputy Accountant (who, we're sure would oblige), in order to give the give the big middle finger to Congress in person but I suppose baby steps are probably better than continued groveling.

FASB's Herz slams politicization of accounting [Reuters] Sphere: Related Content

Ladies and Gentlemen, Our Elected Officials at Work

Regular readers know the affection that the Tramp has for California Rep. Maxine Waters.

Dealbreaker has the best video of the day. The first six seconds are priceless awkwardness. Sphere: Related Content

Bring in the Clowns

Greatest Show on Earth...

Bloomberg is reporting that Nancy Pelosi is going to "push for a comprehensive inquiry" into the causes of the collapse of Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers, and Merrill Lynch because "three-quarters of Americans " want to know.

So let me get this straight: 225 million people want to know what caused the failure of these firms and that will help them how exactly?

Oh, I know: NASCAR Dads and Stepford Wives will definitely be watching the hours and hours of interrogation by politicians like Maxine Waters and then Goldman Sachs conspiracy will gain some traction.

It's all so crystal.

Pelosi Wall Street Probe Modeled on Pecora After Market Crash [Bloomberg]

Sphere: Related Content

What Do We Want? The Right to Value our Level 3 Assets However We Want! When Do We Want it? NOW!

Lots of commentary from all ends of the blogosphere about the end of mark-to-market accounting for the banks. Not exactly the most sexy topic that's out there but it's getting lots of ink because the clowns in Congress are pretty much blaming it for everything but the disappearance of Jimmy Hoffa.

As one commenter put it, "Blaming mark-to-market accounting for the banking sector's woes is like blaming a polar bear stranded on an ice flow for global warming."

Now the best part: God Goldman Sachs is saying that relaxing the rule isn't going to help investors' confidence in the banks anyway. SHEESH.

Throughout this whole dog and pony show, the oracles of double-entry accounting at the FASB really proved themselves to be spineless. Per usual modus operandi, Congress threatens to take a bigger role in overseeing accounting rules and the FASB gets nervous and ultimately bows to the wishes of BFrank, Bingo to the Max, and Ed Perlmutter, who introduced HR 1349 which would form the Financial Accounting Oversight Board, which, if enacted into law, would get to whip the shit out of the FASB whenever it wanted to.

Which I guess would be necessary because when lawmakers forget about the FASB, that allows them to sit up in CT and write rules that actually reflect some transparency. Once those rules become a problem for companies that contribute money to political campaigns, then Congress gets the torches out and beancounter witchhunt is on.

Dartboard valuation seems to be a more fun way for banks to figure out what pieces of paper are worth anyway. Sphere: Related Content

Back and to the Left...

You may remember me commenting on the anger in many circles about the funds that counterparties to the AIG credit default swaps were receiving. My basic point was that not just anyone was investing in these things. Contrary to popular belief (i.e. Congress), there are plenty of people that work at investment banks that know what the hell they're doing

Dealbreaker expands on this subject by stating that conspiracies theories spring up like mariujuana plants in a Santa Cruz closet when "AIG" is added to any otherwise normal settlement of these derivatives.

In other words, Goldman Sachs is making money hand over fist on the unwinding of these transactions with hedge funds but once AIG gets dropped in as the writer, the second gunman on the grassy knoll theories start coming out (including, as DB notes, Zero Hedge, read here).

The whole point is, when AIG starting unwinding these CDS's with taxpayer money, said money went to banks (JPM, BoA, GS, etc.). Does it suck? Of course but I'm not sure if deserves the Maxine Waters conspiracy theory treatment. Sphere: Related Content

Links 3/27/2009

Apparently Jamie Dimon is the Rodney Dangerfield of mega-bank CEOs [Daily Intel]

This will no doubt result in more hearings in which BFrank, Maxine "Bingo" Waters, and friends will continue with brilliant soap-box moments. [Dealbreaker]

Now he tells us! [Reuters] Sphere: Related Content

Maxine Waters Tribute

As regular readers know, there is a special place in Tramp's heart for California Representative Maxine Waters.

Her insight and probing into the AIG collapse, questioning of bank executives, Ben Bernake, Tim Geithner, etc. is nothing short of pure stateswomanship (word?).

Dealbreaker has gone above and beyond the call of duty to pay tribute to this true patriot in American politics.

BINGO To The Max [Dealbreaker] Sphere: Related Content

FROM THE NOT-SO-SURPRISING DEPARTMENT: Maxine Waters Doesn't Make a Damn Bit of Sense

Maxine Waters is doing her constituents proud again today folks. In today's version of AIG crucifixion, she's throwing out the whole Goldman Sachs conspiracy theory as it relates to the eventual dismantling of the entire economy so that GS can be the supreme ruler of the universe. This is sure to fly with the likes of T. Geith and Ben.

Can't BFrank put a stop her batshit insane rambling? I mean, the 5 minutes (or wtf it is) allotted to each member of the subcommittee is one thing but if a committee member can't form a clear and coherent question that is of some relevance to the hearing in under 30 seconds, the chairperson should have the power to call a forfeit for the rest of the time and the cost to the taxpayers of said time should be tracked. Maxine Waters (and reps like this) have clearly done more damage to the poor saps at CSPAN than can possibly be quantified.

Maxine Waters Puts On Her Goldman Sachs Conspiracy Hat [Clusterstock via Daily Intel] Sphere: Related Content