SHOCKER: E&Y Puts Out a Top Ten List That Isn't Funny

Chris Rauber at the San Francisco Business Times is snarking about Ernst & Young's "Top 10 Global Business Risks for Big Multinationals". Two observations come to mind immediately:

1. Atrocious name
2. Letterman should only be allowed to designate anything as "Top 10"

If you read the list, you find that E&Y really went out of their to way to be, as Rauber points out numerous times, painfully obvious. Almost to the point that you wonder if they're having trouble thinking of stuff to put on the list. Next time a project of this nature comes around, try drinking three Red Bulls as fast as you can and follow that with some bumps in the bathroom.

Then get back to working a project like this. We would suspect you might get better (at least more interesting) results.

As if there isn't enough to worry about, Ernst & Young [Chirs Rauber/San Francisco Business Times] Sphere: Related Content

I Want You in the Steel Cage!!!!

One would think that socially awkward interaction between accountants would dissipate with the introduction of the Internet.

But, no, accountants remain seriously dorky and awkward even in cyberspace.

Here's a feeble attempt by a blog to talk shit with a different post that claims that auditors don't have any responsibility for the banking crisis. He lays out his argument and explains and explains and explains why auditors have "massive responsibility" for the crisis.

Fine. I suppose someone had to call out the this lame-o partner who is clueless and just threw together some weakass reasoning about how auditors shouldn't be blamed, but does it have to be done in such an accountant-y way?

I'm just sayin, call the guy some names or make some wild accusations about his wife, for shit's sake. Threaten him with a beatdown or something, ANYTHING. I have very little hope for this profession if this type of wonky, prudish debate continues.

There. I feel better. Sphere: Related Content

Cher. Creative Accounting. Same Sentence. Yes.

I honestly don't know what to say.

Cher, Bono heirs sue Universal Music over royalties [Reuters via AccountancyAge] Sphere: Related Content

The Tony's Decide to Go With Different Dorks to Walk Onstage With Briefcases

Bloomberg is reporting today that KPMG will be taking over the counting of votes for the Tony Awards ousting long time bean vote counters Lutz & Carr.

When asked why the change was made, Alan Wasser, an executive with the awards said, "It gives the Tonys the imprimatur of credibility".

Ok, a couple of comments on that quote:

1. OUCH, Lutz & Carr - did an artsy-fartsy executive just call you out as not being good at vote counting?

2. Since when does KPMG give anything the "imprimatur of credibility"?

Regardless, I'm sure Tim Flynn is busting out the show tunes out of the speakers at 345 Park right now.

KPMG Takes Over Vote Counting for Tonys, Ousting 50-Year Firm [Bloomberg] Sphere: Related Content

IASB Attempting to Start a Hip Hop-esque Fued with the FASB

Hip hop feuds. What would our ubiquitous pop culture world be without them? Well, thank all that is good and holy that now the accounting world has its own version.

John Smith (who is obviously upset about being left out of the This American Life episode) is calling out the United States from way over in Europe, in his dorky bean counter version of a dis song:

"If it doesn't adopt," [Smith] warned, the United States "will be the outlier and those countries already adopting and committing themselves to IFRSs will not accept a situation where the United States remains outside the system indefinitely, yet has a seat at the table."

Whoa. This is striking similar rhetoric to the old East Coast-West Coast days if you ask me. It's clearly a verbal retaliation to Bob Herz's earlier statement, and Smith is bringing it HEAVY. Words like "outlier" and "will not accept a situation" are obviously not going to sit well with his FASB rivals.

It strikes me that the evangelicalism of IFRS is still alive over in the EU while Team America, FUCK YEAH! is not too welcoming of the accounting "good news".

As you were.

U.S. "Will Be The Outlier" Without IFRS [CFO] Sphere: Related Content